The house-iversary

Happy building anniversary to us. 

Today marks one year since we started our nightmare project of a lifetime. 

The day we began framing, one of the friends who was helping asked Ben when he thought we would be in the house. This man had recently built his own family’s home, the only difference being he had four strong teenagers to help him and we were not smart enough to do this when our strength was still living with us. 

Anyway, Ben replied with over-much confidence, “We’ll be in it in six months.”

Jerry raised his eyebrows and asked, “So, have you built a house before?” and Ben scoffed at that trivial detail. 

Yet here we are, still enjoying the process. As I said, happy one-year anniversary to us. 

Here’s our latest update: we have hardwood flooring, kitchen cabinets, interior doors and trim done. We are currently working on switches and sockets, light fixtures and ceiling fans, and soon the beach room will get a coat or two of paint. 

We have not one, but two farmhouse sinks, one of which will hopefully be installed this weekend so we can get Template-man back here soon to do a remeasure. Read his saga here. 

You can see the claw foot tub is still waiting for new claw feet. Were you aware of how many styles of claw feet have been manufactured in the history of freestanding tubs? It is a lot and one thing I’ve learned is that the exact ones you need are the most expensive and the hardest to find.

I’ve suggested to Ben that we just build a 2x4 platform for the tub to sit in and call it good. We are still negotiating. 

Right now I am enjoying sunshine on the front porch with my feet on a pile of cedar logs that will become porch posts while I wait for yet another Lowe’s delivery, hoping this one includes all the tile so we can get started on the mudroom, laundry room, and bathrooms. Our favorite tile guy is with our daughter in Mexico on a mission trip, so we will be DIYing that. 

It seems like we are so close but the list of things needing to be done continues to grow as we remember all the tiny details. 

It occurred to me this week that building a house is like having a baby. 

You start with an idea that sounds like SO! MUCH! FUN! and before you’ve had time to consider the long-term ramifications or the fact that you have no clue what you’re doing, you act on your idea. The foundation is laid and there’s no turning back. 

There is so much work—more than you imagined possible—and huge amounts of food are consumed. As the one who feeds the builders, as well as one who has grown five babies, I know this firsthand.

Whether you are building a house or a baby, welcome to the emotional roller coaster that is your new life. There is exhaustion, elation, impatience, maybe a little vomiting, excitement, frustration, and a few moments of “what were we thinking?” 

And then there are all the decisions. 

What should we name the baby? How many bedrooms and bathrooms? Will the baby co-sleep or have a bassinet in our room? Shingle or metal roof? Should we put the baby in a crib in its own room? What tile? Which vanity? Wood cabinets or painted? Bottle or breastfed? Basement or crawl space? Disposable or cloth diapers? WHAT KIND OF SINK??

We are definitely at the “what were we thinking” stage while simultaneously experiencing severe decision fatigue. “I don’t care” is my new mantra.

We can see the end in sight, but just like in a nine-month pregnancy, the last four weeks are 50% of it, at least in your mind. 

We are at the “don’t ask how much longer” point. 

When we recently applied for an extension on our construction loan, the loan officer (the one who struggled with percents that one time) asked how much more time we needed. Ben told her we’d be done in two months. She was quiet for a moment, and then said gently, “You know, it doesn’t cost any more to get six months, and then you have a buffer … just in case.”

Wise words from a wise woman. Maybe she’s seen this scenario a time or two? We just found out this week she is retiring in June and she said she wasn’t sure she’d be around to see our house completed. I’m not sure what to make of that comment, but I kind of am.

Meanwhile, Thelma and Oreo are about to calve, we are picking up four cows’ worth of meat on Saturday, Lowe’s still has not delivered the big freezer or the tile or the stove, and Ben has taken over his boss’s job at work. Clearly we have all the time in the world.

Happy house-iversary.