Maybe this happened

Sometimes the overwhelm sneaks up on you, even after you’ve had a 2-mile walk in the sunshine. There’s no shame in this. I am 100% sure I’m not the only one who has experienced a semi-meltdown in a very public, full-of-adults place.

Sometimes you walk in the sliding doors of your favorite home-improvement store and look at your list and have no idea where to start and all of life rises up in that moment and demands your full attention.

And sometimes the thought of scouring 40 aisles looking for the first thing on the list when you don’t really even know what that thing is just sends you over the edge.

Maybe you cry in Lowe’s. (Sorry, people of Timberlake, especially you big, tough construction workers who obviously have some compassion for an overly sad woman but don’t know what to do with it.)

Then maybe you pull it together and wipe your little tears and find a guy with a vest.

One thing I’ve learned is to look for the old guys. They know stuff. But now there are red vests and blue vests and also green vests. What do they mean? Are blues at the bottom of the helpfulness scale? Do greens know the most? Does red mean that person is Joe Average? There seem to be more old guys wearing green. Lowe’s, we need a guide to vest colors.

Green guy finds the first thing in plumbing, bless his heart.

But item #2 is electrical (I think?) and he doesn’t know that department. But he is older so perseverance comes naturally. He tells me to wait right here and let him go check something.

Eons later he returns and goes right to a 30-amp quick disconnect (sort of)—it’s in bin J-31 in case you ever find yourself in need—but alas, this one is fused and code says no fuses may be involved. I inwardly curse code and want to hand my list to the writers of it.

Little silver things to cover the holes where pipes come out of a wall—what are they even called? I need ten, please.

Doorstops that must all match. Do we want the solid ones that strip the holes the first time someone kicks them, or the ones that fascinate the grandbabies with their boing-ing? We choose the boingers because we are the fun Grammy and also there are 8 of them the same color.

Three 4-switch covers. There are so many switches I will never learn which one operates what device. Let the switch-flicking commence.

Twenty-five feet of 12/2 wire, which they keep locked up because #copperthieves, so once again you are hunting someone to help you. At least this time you already know what you need so a blue vest will do.

Electrical boxes with flappy things that stick out for added security. How does an educated adult ask where those are?

Hooks to shorten the chains of the lights that hang over the island—must match chain color. These are nonexistent. Two Lowe’s and a Home Depot and there are none to be found. We may use zip ties.

There was more on the list but the end of my mental rope was in sight and fraying rapidly.

Then on to another store to finalize carpet selection. The measurers are coming Wednesday.

Drive home, take the dog out, then back in the car to a second Lowe’s in the opposite direction to order a vanity and buy a light fixture and faucet.

Drop it all off at the farm and head for blessed home. Remember halfway there that we still don’t have shower heads and handles. Do you think the building inspector will notice? When he passed our rough-in inspection he didn’t notice there was no tub drain, so maybe? One can hope. Also closet supplies for the sinks.

So what is the point of me writing all this out?

It’s a reminder to me that overwhelm happens, but nobody is keeping score. It happens to all of us, and while we don’t all cry in the circuit-breaker aisle, it’s okay if we do.

The manly dudes who didn’t know how to react to a little bit of high emotion were reminded that humanity is everywhere and it’s not all covered in concrete dust.

So go ahead, be like a taco and fall apart. It’s good for us all to share our humanness.